(Last Updated On: August 5, 2016)

I stood there in the cold silence of the night thinking of the next step that I needed to take… The fear of the unknown cropping me.Truth be told, it was the best spot to end my life and rescue my “supposed self” from all the anguish and deep struggles that I believed no supreme being could rescue me from; or so I thought.

The pains were deeply engrained to the core of my heart. Why do I have to overburden mother earth will all my troubles, worries and problems? Having goggled, yahooed and binged all the motivational advices that I could lay my hands on with no concrete change, I think it was time for me to make the courageous step. It was time to say goodbye and usher myself uninhibited into the land of the living dead.

Had Christianity really failed me or was it vice-versa? Was i in fear of the overwhelming and unconditional saving love of Christ? What had happened to Psalm 23 in me? Why was I suddenly afraid of facing it all? This plus many other unconstructive questions kept running through my mind giving me the more reason to take the bold step of travelling the journey less travelled by “the saved”..

…10…37…49…66…71…I continued to count my heartbeats which were congruently aligned with the ticking of the bridge clock mountainously standing a ¼ miles away. What really did John 14:6 or rather Matthew 11:28 mean? Because I was convinced there was no other way around my current situation.

”Weh! Umetokwa na wazimu!”(Hey, have you been overrun by madness!)Came an authoritative but soft voice within me; But was the voice within enough to make me change my mind?




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